Rebekah Diaddigo

March 15, 2020March 15, 2020 bluebirduncaged Uncategorized

3.15.2020 (COVID-19)

Wow, what a week, y’all. Between work and COVID-19 I think it’s in the top most event{full} weeks of my life. So many emotions. Surreal even. Concerning the Coronavirus, I’m actually really surprised at where I’ve landed today; a complete 180 from where I began the week. Here’s an attempt at organizing the many thoughts bouncing around the brain.

My initial reaction was frustration. It seems like things are being blown out of proportion and, frankly, I don’t do drama so I wanted everyone to get over it real quick. Like, toilet paper stockpiling? Really y’all? Chill. And what? the studios are closed? No dance for 3 weeks? So am I still going to get paid if you cancel my classes? It’s not quite like I can “work from home”? You should have heard me Thursday and Friday — I was zinging (thanks to Mr. C and Mommy and Daddy for listening to the rants). But then I started to examine my own heart.

I’m learning how much I LOVE my autonomy.
If you know me well, you know that under the right circumstances, I can be a bit of a renegade. And when events started getting cancelled and shows postponed and businesses closed, I started feeling like the reins were being pulled in. When we were younger my parents used to say “if you can’t control yourself, we’ll have to control you” “What? I’m a responsible adult,” I thought, “I can make my own decisions regarding my health and the health of those around me.”

Yes, yes, I can and I’m so grateful to live in the one and only, amazing, beloved United States of America in which I’m allowed to make decisions for myself. But I also want to use that freedom wisely. And am I really trusting the authority I’ve been placed under? Or do I pridefully think I know better than them? I am not saying to blindly follow directions without question but perhaps there is a structure in place for a reason and perhaps they have better information and knowledge than I do.

And then the research began…
I’m no expert and won’t reiterate what others have more eloquently penned but I found these articles to be quite helpful and informative as I tried to come to my own conclusions.

Coronavirus: Why You Must Act Now
Flatten the Curve
Why Outbreaks Spread Exponentially
Update from Concerned Physicians

Social Distancing
I woke up yesterday morning fully intending to attend a wedding shower that evening and church today. Yet, the more I researched, the more I felt convicted to practice social distancing. As a healthy, young, individual who is likely to be nominally affected if infected by the virus, I thought I’d continue to live life fairly normal (apart from cancelled work). Yet, I also interact with children on a regular basis. And though I may not be showing any symptoms, I could very well be a carrier. And as much as I love being the independent woman that I am, the reality is that this could be a life or death situation for someone else. For sure, the FOMO is real and I really don’t want to have to postpone my birthday plans for next weekend but if it helps “flatten the curve,” count me in. Though our days are numbered before we are born, I don’t want to contribute to even one person dying without knowing Jesus. And I don’t want to disqualify myself from being of help if I am needed later down the road. (This article was helpful on this subject)

What about the Church?
Aren’t we called to step in at times like this? Why would we close our doors if this is the time, people need Jesus the most? My social media feed is filled with polarizing views; each “side” criticizing the other. May I suggest a third option? We can be BOTH tangible hope to our worlds while still wisely stewarding our social contact. We can still bring sandwiches to the local ministry who helps feed kids who are without meals because schools are closed. We can still open phone/text conversations with friends and offer the hope of Jesus to those who need to process the whole situation. Yes, some of us may be called to the front lines and we stand behind you in solidarity. Church, yes, let’s rise up to be the hands and feet of Jesus. Let’s steward these opportunities well as we live in unique times.

My prayer is that as people have some forced downtime, and possibly time for their hearts to be quiet from distraction, that they would be drawn to examine Jesus and the many amazing resources online.

I’m also more aware of my own selfishness.
Looking back at the reasons mentioned for my frustration, they all stem from me being inconvenienced. I recognize that I’ve possibly idolized the act of doing things (being that I’ve already made a list of things to do over the next two weeks and plan on scheduling my days to accomplish them).

Maybe I should attempt to just be. Going to try to stay off my phone. More Jesus time. More reading. More writing. More dreaming (haha, that could be dangerous). More just being.

I don’t want to let this season be one of discontentment— let us choose to find the moments for which to be grateful. In the forced isolation, let us not be tempted to fill the noise with distraction but have ears and hearts to hear what God might be whispering.

I am not afraid.
I don’t fear contracting the virus and if I do, I’m hopeful to recover but if I don’t, then I get to see Jesus and what’s better than that? (don’t worry, I’m not going to be stupid and try to hasten my time before it’s appointed).

Yet my heart is heavy for our nation and the world. The way people have reacted to this pandemic shows how much underlying fear is present in our society. What have we become? Where is our trust? Is it in our hand sanitizer and disinfectant wipes or is it in an all powerful, all knowing, loving God? Nothing is a surprise to Him.

May we choose worship over worry. Great Healer, we need you— America needs you, the world needs you. Bring peace to our hearts. Bring hope to our outlooks. In our forced quietness, show us the still waters you faithfully lead us by.

Pray, Pray, Pray
President Trump has declared it to be a national day of prayer but don’t let it stop there with us. Let us remember this is very much a spiritual war. The Prince and Power of the air and spiritual forces of darkness are pushing hard for territory right now. We will not stand by idly. Rise up, warriors of Light and Truth!

May we be wise but not act out of fear. May we not be selfish but seek the good of others. May we wash our hands but keep them open in surrender for this life is not ours to control. May we disinfect all the surfaces but not become obsessive for that means our hearts have become distracted. May we wisely live and love boldly and as a result be drawn closer to Jesus in this season. Kyrie Elieson, Lord have mercy.

PS-This article and this article from RZIM were also helpful.

March 8, 2020 bluebirduncaged Uncategorized

3.8.2020

The first “big kid” roller coaster I rode was the Mind Bender at Six Flags (Dahlonega Mine Train doesn’t count). I was so excited to go on “the one with the loops” and talking a big game while we waited in line. But as soon as we got strapped in, a pang of trepidation hit my heart and tears filled my eyes. What was I doing? This was actually kind of scary.

“Do you trust me?” Daddy whispered in my ear. “Yes” I whimpered. I knew Daddy had done this before. I knew that he would never willingly put me in danger (if anything, he would protect me from it). I knew that he would never ask me to do something without reason. He had a proven track record of taking care of me. I took his word without a doubt that the risk was worth the reward. Of course I trusted him.

Needless to say, the next time that little train came back to the loading platform, I was all smiles.

I think God does this with life sometimes. At the beginning of 2017 I asked God for fearless trust in the coming year. No particular reason except that it had a nice ring to it and definitely was something to aspire towards in my faith journey. Little did I know what it would take to practice trusting fearlessly. Over the past year and a half, I’ve found myself in several situations in which I had no control over the outcome — these outcomes had repercussions into the future both financially and relationally.

I was getting strapped into the roller coaster and was easy to start whimpering at the big loops and what-ifs ahead. But God was right there whispering “Do you trust me?” Yes, I trust you, Abba. And the little train pulled out of the loading platform to start ticking up that first hill…

Three years later, I’m not sure it’s come back to the loading platform (it probably won’t until I see Jesus face to face, haha) but I’m choosing to enjoy the ride in the mean time; trusting He’s got it under control and will never fail to put His faithfulness on display.

March 1, 2020 bluebirduncaged Uncategorized

3.1.2020

A few days ago, I began the day filled with gratitude with where God has me in life. Not saying life is easy but it’s full and beautiful.

I’m learning a lot. Getting inspired for some new projects. Expectant for things ahead. Stepping out in a few faith-risks.

But then, after some very normal activities and interactions, my thoughts started spiraling into fear and frustration and I ended the day asking “why?”

I know that God’s plan for my life is way better than I can even imagine, so why do I fear things might not work out in ways I think would make me happy? I know His thoughts are higher than my thoughts so why do I doubt who He’s called me to be? I know He will never leave me nor forsake me so why do I feel lonely and isolated even in the midst of community?

I came home to my dear brother and roommate, Caleb, voicing the inner dialogue running through my mind on the way home. “It’s all in your head,” he said. To which I replied exasperated, “Pastor Caleb, (he has a seminary degree) tell me something else!”

My mom said the same thing, as I was on the phone with her, “Have you been reading that book I gave you?” (referring to Get Out of Your Head by Jennie Allen) “No” I confessed, “I was trying to finish the other one I’m on first.”

She reminded me of the spiritual war, we find ourselves in. It’s a constant struggle between the flesh and the Spirit. And more often than not, our battles are fought in the mind.

And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may be able to prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect
~Romans 12:2

When I give in to the merry-go-round of anxious thoughts, am I really trusting God is who He says He is? Or am I praying to myself (as my dad describes worry)? Do I believe God is good or, in my pride, do I feel like He’s withholding a deserved blessing (is there really such a thing)?

…for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ…
~2 Corinthians 10:4-5

I confess I haven’t been great at taking those rogue thoughts captive lately. I confess they’ve led my heart into distraction.

My pastor this morning, preached from Hebrews 12:1-3.

Therefore since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of faith…

Fixing our eyes on Jesus. Taking captive every thought. Throwing off the sin that bogs us down.

We’re meant to run this race with endurance. It’s not efficient to carry things we’re meant to give to God. He asks us to cast our anxieties on Him. He cares for us. He is good. We have to remember that fear is a liar. And doubt can be healthy if we allow it to strengthen our faith. But when we let it pull our gaze from the One who calls and sustains us, we end up miserably relying on our own strength.

His grace is sufficient. My pastor reminded us this morning “Jesus does not regret His work in you, and Jesus will not neglect His work in you”

May we rest in that. May we not be spectators in the battle for our minds; for our minds are the gateway to our hearts. May we CHOOSE to believe God is good and working for His glory. The author and perfecter of our faith will never let us down.

…maybe I should go read that book now…

July 21, 2018 bluebirduncaged Uncategorized

Stay

Being the first summer in five years that I haven’t traveled out of the country, I’ve been missing Latin America a little extra these days.

I *almost* booked a spontaneous trip to Panama for the Panama Ballet Festival. Literally, was so close.

I feel like I’m sitting in a chair (like those blue ones that go with school desks) and white knuckling the edges forcing myself to stay put.

I’ve been seeing friends leave on their summer adventures and feeling a twinge of — shall I even admit it? — jealousy.

So I pray — Because that’s the closest thing to going being able to go myself.

Then I realize— while I’m over here wishing I was somewhere else, I’m missing what’s in front of me.

God has basically dropped a mission in my lap!

A group of girls eager to study scripture. Students and co-workers who need encouragement. An amazing 18-19 season for Bluebird to prepare for.

And so, I stay.

I’m reminded of Psalm 37.

Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness ~Ps. 37:3

May we be diligent to steward the moment, not wishing we were somewhere else but seeing the opportunities before us from the perspective of eternity and being obedient to persevere in the Spirit. Teach us to trust and help us remember, Lord.

December 27, 2017 bluebirduncaged Uncategorized

miracles in the mundane

I’ve been thinking about this advent season, a season of waiting, a season of expectation — and I think about how the Israelites waited 400 years. Four hundred years! Generations lived and died without seeing the fulfillment of His promises. And my season of waiting pales in comparison.

I think about how our generation can barely wait for a hot pocket to microwave and wonder how the Israelites kept going. Did they ever feel like giving up?

Often, in our waiting, we try to find ways to fill the void of “not yet.” And in some ways that’s good. We have to prepare for what’s coming. Yet when the time between promise and fulfillment is filled with worry or busyness or tantrums, we miss the point.

The Enemy likes to use this box of time and space against us; reminding us of the ever increasing to-do list or how people have failed us time and time again. It’s easy to become cynical and callous; bitter almost. It’s easy to forget the promise. To become weary in the waiting.

Yet, He is Hope itself. He is our Sustainer. He reminds us of the promise.

The fulfillment of that promise might not always look the way we expect — I wonder if anyone was thinking the King Savior would come as a baby during the tumult and craziness of a census.

And if we’re not careful, we might miss it. If we’re so focused on planning and orchestrating how we think the promise should be fulfilled, we’ll always be discontent. Striving. Never satisfied. Never seeing the wonder.

Yet, if our hearts are fixed on the author and perfecter of our faith, we’ll know this race is not in vain. Simeon and Anna saw it. They saw it because in the midst of their normal routines, their hearts were fixed on eternity. And from the Promise Maker's perspective of eternity, it's not a matter of "if" but "when."

It happens because we don’t take these earthly moments for granted. When we know they are fleeting and meant for more, we see the wonder and are filled with awe. It happens because we take the time to be still in his presence. The patience to see a promise fulfilled is sustained by trust in the Promise Maker.

He never, ever, ever fails. He always comes through.

May we not miss these miracles in mundane.

Lord, fix our eyes on you and not what we think the fulfillment of your promises look like. Satisfy our souls and strengthen us with patience in the hope[full] moments of "not yet." Teach us to be still this advent season.

I remain confident of this: that I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living. Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. ~Psalm 27:13,14

August 20, 2017 bluebirduncaged Things I'm learning

learning to enjoy the fajita

Abide and Enjoy the fajita — I’ve had a sticky note on my dash with this reminder all summer.

It’s a lesson I thought I had “learned” several years ago…

Being a typical goal-oriented, box-checking, achievement-driven, firstborn it’s natural for me to think in if/then scenarios. If I have all the right answers and do all the right things then I won’t have to question why or find myself in an undesirable situation…[riiiiiiight, if only, haha]

Back as a ballet student, I thought “if I try 110% in class, apply all my corrections, show up on time, have a pleasant attitude, learn the choreography quickly (both my part and someone else’s, hehe), don’t ever let them see me upset, never have holes in my tights etc, etc then I’ll get the casting or the promotion that I want” I learned quickly that it doesn’t work that way. All those ifs are good and desirable goals but it’s not a formula and the outcome isn’t contingent on whether I’ve checked all the boxes.

Sometimes you just have to choose not to try to figure it out.

Lately, I’ve found myself slipping into that mentality spiritually. If I learn this lesson, spend time daily with Jesus, pray a lot, tell others about Jesus, etc, etc then I’ll be rewarded with blessing XYZ.

I don’t think I necessarily acted from this motivation but I noticed subconsciously my thoughts were filtering through it. I was getting frustrated because according to all the books/worldly advice/outward appearances, I was following the formula but not getting the desired results.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, Rebekah — pride check. Who are you to think that you can manipulate God!? Again, all of those things are wonderfully desirable and amazing habits to have but my heart wasn’t in the right place. That’s not living under grace but under the law!

A sweet reminder came while reading Brennan Manning’s Patched Together:

“When you get to heaven, Little Friend,…Abba will not ask you how many prayers you said or how many souls you saved. No, he’ll ask, ‘Did you enjoy the fajita?’ He wants you to live with passion in the beauty of the moment, accepting and enjoying his gifts”

How beautiful. The pressure is off!

He’s simply asking me to enjoy the fajita. To cease striving and abide + rest in the Truth that HE is God. To find my true delight in HIM without expecting a “reward” of the desires of my fleshly heart. Scripture says the pure in heart will see God; HE is the Desire Giver and every good and perfect gift is from Him alone — it’s nothing that I’ve earned. HE is faithful to finish the work He starts and to fulfill the calls HE’s placed on my life.

And when my heart attitude is one of gratefulness + grace, my actions are motivated by love rather than trying to earn love. It’s backwards and completely freeing.

I want to live like that.

Jesus, you are all we need, be all that we want. Forgive us for cheapening your grace down to formulas and checklists. Teach us to simply enjoy the fajita that your grace might flow through us from pure hearts.

May 29, 2017 bluebirduncaged My Life

a story 17 years in the making…

After reading these pages in third grade, I announced, “I’m going to be a missionary to Cuba!” Being that it was a closed country at the time, my parents said hesitantly, “Let’s keep praying about that…”

Through the years, Cuba still lingered in the back of my mind. Known for their bravura and impeccable technique, the Cuban dancers came onto my radar and as I pursued more serious ballet training, I began to wonder if dance would be my way into the country. “Train with the Cubans.” I had one instructor tell me out of the blue.

Around the same time that Bluebird Uncaged began to travel internationally, the US and Cuba began the process of normalizing their relationship. I had just begun to discover how the universal language of dance could open doors to talk about Jesus and started dreaming about expanding our outreach to other countries—Cuba, of course, was on the list.

After traveling to Panama for four consecutive summers, we decided to take a break from traveling internationally in 2017 in order to refocus our efforts and research more destinations.

I started looking into Cuba through talking to other [dance] groups who had been before.

One night I was perusing a missions organization site and came across a dance trip to Cuba with a group in California. I emailed them for more information to add to my research. “Come with us!” was the reply. At the time, things weren’t exactly lining up. I had previously committed to teach during the time the trip was taking place and didn’t want to go back on my word. “Maybe we can change the dates,” they said.

The next week, my boss came to me and said that the hours I was scheduled to teach were actually tentative. Was God releasing me to go somewhere this summer?

The trip with the California group got postponed to later in the fall, close to our preparations for Uncaged Christmas.

Weeks went by and still no confirmed summer teaching. I continued to pray for clarity in my summer plans.

On Tuesday, May 16, my friend Lauren, texts me and says “Hey girl!! Random but would you be interested in going on a dance mission trip to Cuba?” I hadn’t told Lauren at all about Cuba! “Oh. My. Goodness” I replied, “Call me with details”

Turns out that they had a team going and someone dropped out last minute. They needed one more person in order to get the group airfare rate and I just “popped into Lauren’s head.”

She needed an answer by the end of the day. I reeeaaaallllllly wanted to go and thought it was a God orchestrated situation but called my parents for wise counsel before committing. “Sounds like you need to be in Cuba this summer” Daddy said. I texted Lauren back, “I’M IN!!!”

You might have to scrape me off the ceiling with a spatula, I can barely contain my excitement! I’M GOING TO CUBA!!!!!!

Our team will be working with Ganadores de Almas para Cristo (Soul Winners for Christ), a youth evangelism training and discipleship program. More specifically, we will be training them with tools to use dance in worship.

I’m excited and a tad nervous but completely in awe of the Lord’s faithfulness to fulfill the dreams that He plants. May Jesus continue to be the center of this adventure as He draws hearts to Himself.

Stay tuned for updates!

Prayer request: because I am taking someone’s spot on the team and they had already started the visa process, we have to request a name change on the visa. Pray that we will have favor and permission will be granted expeditiously.

Book: You Can Change The World vol. 2: Learning to Pray for People Around the World

April 5, 2017 bluebirduncaged My Life

Send me…where?!

If you had asked little Rebekah what wanted to be when I grew up, I would have quickly replied “A missionary!” Being a professional ballet dancer was the furthest thing from my mind. Sure, I loved going to ballet class once a week but it was just for fun.

I kept waiting for an opportunity to “go on a mission trip” but as I got more serious about ballet, my summers were taken up with intensives and extra training opportunities. I realized that for the time being, my “mission field” was exactly where God had placed me. I started looking for ways to love and serve those around me. To encourage the girls in my class (even if I reeeeaaalllly wanted to be chosen for that part over her).

My junior year of high school, God made it clear that I should pursue a career as a professional dancer (another story for another day). I stepped up my training and started thinking about companies I might want to dance for. Things started moving forward and it’s not that they weren’t working out…they just didn’t look like the way I envisioned. I started looking at the typical trajectory of a professional dancer and the realized how selfish of a profession it really was. In the end, it seemed empty.

But I knew that God had called me on this path. “I gave you these gifts for a reason,” He said, “How are you going to use them?” So I asked myself the question, “what does this world need to hear?” the words hope and dignity kept resurfacing. Hope because Jesus is hope. Dignity because He created each of us in His image for a specific purpose.

Out of that, Bluebird Uncaged was born. We started out with a video project, Beautiful Things. Laura came to visit me in January of 2013 and we were talking about how we’d love to use dance to tell people about Jesus in other countries. “Well, your sister lives in Panama [Central America],” I said, “how about we go there?” I mentioned the idea to my parents and they said that I had to have more than just one connection there to go. So I randomly emailed an organization that was already making a difference in the community. “We’ve been praying about hosting an arts festival all year!” they replied, “and you all are the confirmation that we should do it.” God uses dance to open doors.

Since then, Bluebird has returned to Panama for the past four summers and dance has opened the doors to allow us to talk about Jesus in jails, orphanages, public squares, and local theaters. It’s been beautiful.

But all of that is a little beside the point. I want to encourage you to look around — realize the gift God has given you and the people He’s placed beside you. You have a unique sphere that no one else on the planet has. Your giftings, your personality, your skill sets—are all useful in communicating the story of Jesus. Jill Briscoe puts it this way, “the place between your own two feet at any given time [is] your mission field.”

Take a moment to recount the doors God has opened for you on your dance journey (or even the ones He’s clearly closed). Now think about the people you met along the way. How many other people have had that combination of life experiences?!

As dancers, it’s easy to get caught up in our personal journey (and to a degree we have to be focused on bettering ourselves to stay on top of our game) but look at the bigger picture. Your training as a dancer, gives you a unique position; you can relate to your fellow dancers in ways others can’t. Keep that in mind the next time you’re wondering why you’re just an understudy.

Looking back on my journey, if I were where I wanted to be (and not where God knew I needed to be), then I wouldn’t have seen certain friends meet Jesus. Hold your gift of dance with open hands for it’s merely the tool we’ve been given to communicate Hope and Truth. These are the moments where time meets eternity; may you courageously steward them as grace[full] invitations to the Jesus story.

Praying for you dear dancers. Keep shining! -RKD

This post was originally published on the Beautiful Feet Network blog.

February 9, 2017 bluebirduncaged Things I'm learning

pleasant places

Photo: Yana Yarosevich

Lord, you alone are my portion and my cup; you make my lot secure. The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance. I will praise the Lord, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me. I keep my eyes always on the Lord. With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure, because you will not abandon me to the realm of the dead, nor will you let your faithful one see decay. You make known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.
~‭‭Psalm‬ ‭16:5-11‬